The Texas Connection Vol. 10

March 24, 2021 Hanna Carroll

It's time for a mid-week pick me up.

Welcome back to the Texas Connection. Grab your cup of coffee (or beer) and read this week's interesting finds from your Pals at Texas Humor.

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Howdy, friends! Here's your news updates for this week:

In Your Neck of the Woods:

This 12 year-old was arrested for driving a stolen SUV into a Texarkana KFC.
If you thought you could be a 'Tiger King.' Think again. It's illegal in Texas.
Did you see what was off the coast of Galveston? I know I never got in the water before... but now you REALLY won't see me in the water.
March 29: A day that any Texan over the age of 16 is eligible to receive the COVID vaccine. Do with this as you wish.
Texas Humor is throwing in a free sticker pack with orders over $18.36 this week.

Weird Finds:

Have you ever wondered what the most common superstition in Texas is? And no, it's not black cats.
I have some fears in life... and this. This is one of them.
Remember the $35 yard sale bowl? It just sold for $722,000. Check before ya sell, y'all.
Need to meet new neighbors? Try this free beer tactic.
Are you cleaning your coffee maker? It could be why you're feeling a little sick lately...

The Furry Friend Weeklies:

If you're missing a package... this furry friend might be who to blame.
These two furry Texans made it to the finals of the Cadbury bunny contest. This is a must-see.
This South Austin Beaver finally made it to safety and is now in a rehab felicity. See how he's doing here.

Until next week... stay newsy my friends.

Howdy! I’m back with another Tex-venture for ya. This week I’m taking us up to the Panhandle, to the “Grand Canyon of Texas”, Palo Duro Canyon State Park.

It should come to no surprise that the country’s 2nd biggest canyon (behind the Grand Canyon) is right here in our home state. I mean everything is bigger in Texas. You’ll want to pack on the sunscreen for this one, because I guarantee that the sun will be shining down right on you. Hike, bike, and even horseback ride throughout over 30 miles of trails.

I’ve only made the journey up north once to visit this park, and a 2nd trip is in the works to visit this hidden gem, and I’ve gotta say the Lighthouse trail was worth the drive. It’s a moderate hike, and definitely worth carrying a good amount of water with ya, but reasonable for all levels of hikers. 5.7 miles (roundtrip) down a sunny trail can find itself to be a bit exhausting, but power through and you’ll get to catch one of the best views of Texas.

Other popular trails (that I plan on catching next time):

Rock Garden Trail
CCC Trail
Lower Comanche Trail

Get the best out of this trip and catch another Texas gem with a quick 30 minute drive out to Cadillac Ranch in Amarillo. Grab some spraypaint and leave Texas some love, but remember to take your trash with ya!

Happy trails!

Howdy Y’all!

This week I was going to write about my favorite pie shop, but then I saw this article and well. It’s a whole story y’all.

For those of you who don’t know, The Turkey Leg Hut is a Houston staple. They are known for their massive fall off the bone STUFFED turkey legs. That’s right, STUFFED. I’m talking about crawfish mac and cheese stuffed, dirty rice stuffed, and more.

Pictured: (left) Dirty rice and shrimp. with alfredo sauce on the side. (Photo: Hanna N- yelp.) (right) The crawfish mac'n'cheese turkey leg (Photo: Ronald W-yelp.)

It is de-li-cious, and I’ve only had it a handful of times because of how difficult it is to acquire one of their coveted turkey legs. That is why I was so excited to read this article because while I am from the Houston area, I am currently living in Dallas, and I wasn’t going to miss any opportunity to get one of these turkey legs. Well, that’s what I thought. When I pulled up to the parking lot, there was a 20+ car line to just get into the parking lot. Not even the standing line to get the turkey legs. I waited in the car line for an hour, and was finally given entry into the parking lot where I had to wait in a line for 4+ hours. Y’all. I have NEVER. I waited in that line until 10:30pm and I had to leave TURKEY LEG-LESS because I still had to drive an hour back to Dallas. I was tired, I was cold, and I was upset. That is why I am making this list of tricks to help y’all get one of these turkey legs hassle free.

1. CALL AHEAD Y’ALL: When visiting their Houston location, make sure you call ahead to confirm their hours. They are always closed on Mondays for clean up and reorganization, but during the rest of the week, they take about an hour from 4pm-5pm to restock and replenish their inventory. This does not mean the line will be empty. In fact, this is when the line will be longest because it’s not moving! You just want to make sure that when you go get these turkey legs that you don’t get stuck in this replenishing time because it will make the wait longer.

2. ORDER PICKUP Y’ALL: If you really want to be in and out, you should call in and order to go. This way, you can skip the long 2 hour line and just go in and get your food. This does require some extra help though. You should go with someone so you can circle around the area in your car while they go in and get the food. Parking is very limited in the area, and you don’t want to get caught paying insane prices or getting towed. If you don’t mind missing out on sitting in the restaurant, this is the best option for you. In fact, The Turkey Leg Hut is close to some beautiful parks, so you could even do a little picnic if you don’t want to wait to get home.

3. RESERVATIONS Y’ALL: If you want to eat at the restaurant and avoid the long lines, you need to make a reservation. There is no minimum amount of people you need to make a reservation, and it is truly the best way to avoid waiting for multiple hours. It’s important that you make the reservation well in advance. It is a first come first served basis, so you can imagine they fill up really quickly. Try calling ahead at least 24 hours in advance to ensure that your spot is saved.

4. BACKUP Y’ALL: If you forget to make a reservation and forget to order pickup, You. Need. Backup. This line is a will breaker. When you first get in line you’ll think it’s all good, no problem, you’ve got this. No. You don’t. I’m so sorry honey, but you will not make it. You need to get your closest friend, family member, or a random stranger to trade standing in line with you. While one person is waiting in line, the other person will find a place to park the car. These are both difficult tasks because parking is very limited in the area around the restaurant and standing for multiple hours is not fun. Make sure you trade off regularly until you get to the front and then you’re home free.

I hope these tricks serve you well, and I hope you are able to enjoy one of these insane turkey legs. They have a huge menu, so pick strategically and don’t go overboard your first round. The Turkey Leg Hut isn’t going anywhere, so you can always go back for more. One of these days I’ll make it back to Houston and get one for myself, but until then,

I hope you eat something delicious.

One of my favorite things is a good post-trail run beer. As the weather begins to warm and now that it's officially Spring (that means no more cold weather right? RIGHT!?), I'm sure everyone is itching to get outdoors to hike, float, tip some cows, ride a bike, fish, get a fresh layer of sunburn, ya know, all the basic outdoorsy type stuff in Texas.
If you're anything like me, you'll probably wanna take a few beverages along to accompany your adventures. Since it's kind of hard to take margaritas hiking, beer is your best bet. Side note, if you've figured out a good way to take margaritas out and about, let's go hiking together.
Whether you're camping, floating, or hitting the trails, I think these five beers def hit that "I'm doing some physical activity outdoors so I deserve a refreshing Texas beer" criteria:

Equal Parts Brewing, Lagerbier: A "German-style pilsener" that's light, subtle, crisp, and malty. This is currently my "easy drinkin'" go-to.
Austin Beerworks, Pearlsnap: Another "German-style pilsener" that's refreshing and just a tad bitter.
Hopfusion Aleworks, Feisty Blonde: This one is a bit different than the others listed with a higher ABV and "fuller" flavor and body with honey and Mexican vanilla. It's a unique blonde.
Saint Arnold Brewing, Lawnmower: I feel like nearly all beer drinkers in this State have had a Lawnmower at some point and if you haven't, you should fix that soon. It's a classic outdoor beer that's perfect for our 100+ degree summers.
Zilker Brewing Company, La Beer: A limited collaborative release with La Barbecue that paired perfectly with my barbacoa (not from La Barbecue) the other night. Tastes (and looks) like beer your dad probably drank. It's a rad beer.

If you're the trail type, here are some of my favorite trails (all good for running, biking, and hiking) to regularly hit before consuming the previously mentioned beers:

Mt. Lakeway: It's sort of hard to tell that there is a nice trail system here, but Mt. Lakeway provides a challenging climb (for this area) and some nice views. Be sure to ring the bell once you make it to the top!
Reveille Peak Ranch: You have to pay a small entrance fee here, but it is def worth it. Lots of granite and tons of miles with the option to camp. If you're going out here to ride, check out Spider Mountain right down the road with some of the best downhill trails I've seen in the state, complete with a chairlift.
Northshore Trail: One-way trail system covering the north shore of Lake Grapevine. I miss living close to this one but hit it with every visit to N Texas.
Barton Creek Trail: there are plenty of spots to hop onto this expansive trail system, but the one linked is easy to string a few miles together and it's generally less crowded than other areas of Barton Creek.

Hope everyone is enjoyin' this nice Spring weather before it gets unbearably hot. Cheers, y'all!

The Ghastly Ghost Cow of Brownsville…

On a suspiciously dark stretch of FM 51 in Brownsville, something sinister lies quietly night after night waiting to capture its next victim with its phantom lactose lure.

Drivers in this area have been recorded saying that out of nowhere a terrifying zombified corpse of a cow will jump into the middle of the road!

That's right! You could be driving home one night, some hot Whataburger strapped in the passenger seat next to you, compin on some salty af fries and then BOOM! GHOST COW!

What are you gonna do? Swerve?!? Come on I know it's a Texan driving in this situation, we’re going 50 over the speed limit, because I don’t mess with soggy and cold Whata-buns!

But if you don't swerve then what?!?! You’re tellin’ me that you’ll put money down that this is a real ghost cow and not just some random heifer in the road?!? Nope not me, my little buick can’t take a ton of ground beef to the windshield.

See there is no good option here! The Ghost Cow is truly one of the most underrated ghost stories of all time. It's not just some casper out here pushing over something, or making the room cold! Nope! It's out here giving Texas drivers one more thing to worry about on the road!

So I guess what I’m trying to say is, beware the Ghost Cow, and always, ALWAYS buckle in your Whataburger on the ride home.

(Below is an artist rendition of the Ghost Cow: Viewer discretion is advised)